Upshot-Dating™ is my Signature System, which is how I met and married my husband within nine months of dating, continues to be replicated by my clients.
Using my system, it takes a woman between 6 months to about 2 years to find the right man for her and get the commitment she wants.
Yet, no matter how good I am at what I do, my system requires a client to do her part of the work.
I am proud of my system, but your success at love will be yours to take pride in.
Here are the 5 things I found, in my private consultations with clients, that may be getting in the way of your success in love.
1.) Lack of discipline and commitment.
Discipline, by my favourite definition, is what you want now versus what you want long term. Discipline is a moment-to-moment choice.
It is based on a commitment you have made. It means that you will do what you have committed to do, despite how you may feel in a given moment.
In dating, this translates to staying committed and focused on your dating goal, even if initially you do not meet any decent men online. That is before you have become an Online Dating Queen.
Being disciplined in dating means continuing to date, even if a man on a date says or does something really stupid. Or if another man ghosted you even though you felt this was promising, or if a man you felt you connected with does not ask you out on a second date… You get the picture: no single man and no single experience, or even a silly random comet, can get you off your track.
2.) It seems too good to be true.
This is very common. I had that too, and it held me back from dating for a few weeks, but I got a hold of it fairly quickly.
When you think it is too good to be true, it seems to only happen to others; the good things are somehow not compatible with you. You feel like a bystander, watching others get engaged and find good men from the sidelines.
This read will pick you up where you are at: The question is not if, but HOW?
3.) Fear of the result.
Even though we say it is what we want, we are secretly scared to actually get it.
Your biggest enemy here will be self-sabotage.
Women, I have seen in session, often find the sneakiest ways to sabotage and find fault with the man.
When things go too well, she will create fights out of nowhere, suddenly see only the negative and find fault in everything he is and does. She will convince herself that he is not good enough, and she will have doubts.
Your Modern Queen Mantras to fix this:
I am able to receive all the good things that come my way. I deserve this.
I am 100% capable of having a healthy and happy romantic relationship, regardless of my past.
4.) It challenges others.
If your mother, aunts or best friends are not dedicated to this work, you will have to tolerate some discomfort. Some relationships may not survive this phase.
-> Bina’s circle of friends completely changed when she began to appreciate men, made peace with them, became a feminine woman and committed to Upshot-Dating™ and inner work. She is now happily married and has recently given birth to a baby. Her old friends are still single and bitter about online dating and men.
5.) Postponing and having the wrong priorities.
Postponing until we get the promotion, wrap up the current project at work, or until after the exam, and only then can we be happy in life or make time for dating and finding the love of our life.
-> I had a client who believed that she could not manage having a boyfriend and an academic career. While working with me, she got engaged and had him by her side all the way through writing and defending her thesis. He packed lunches for her, and did almost all household chores. Got her the biggest bouquet of flowers to celebrate the thesis and whisked her away on a vacation where he proposed. Being with him made her life easier and happier, and it was no contradiction to her career.