Are you a successful, intelligent modern woman who feels completely invisible to the right men? It is a common frustration for the Modern Queen: you have mastered your career and your busy lifestyle, yet your love life feels non-existent.

You may be moving through the world with speed and efficiency, not realising that your “busyness” has become a shield that keeps decent men at a distance. As a Clinical Psychologist, certified dating coach, and the founder of Upshot-Dating®, I specialise in helping women like you shift from “doing” mode into Feminine Energy.

By implementing the tools I teach, you can move from being unapproachable to being a magnet for the right man. This client case study shows how a busy career woman and single mother went from being unnoticed in airport lounges to being effortlessly approached and asked out by decent men.

Matilda (*Name changed for privacy reasons) is a high-profile lawyer who flies back and forth between Berlin and Strasbourg almost weekly for work. Matilda is also a single mother to a 15-year-old boy and is responsible for her beautiful villa and household. You can imagine she is busy!

This is what Matilda wrote to me from a business trip:

“Anina, your training is doing magic! After just two weeks of working with you, my experience has completely changed. I have been on the same flights, in the same airport lounges, and even visited the same coffee shops and hotels for several years, and I have never met anyone. Now I cannot stop men from approaching me and asking me out.”

Matilda did not work less or change her routine; instead, she applied the three things I had told her to. This changed the way she appears to men in day-to-day life. You too can do this anywhere, anytime.

Edit: This client has since gotten engaged through Upshot-Dating® and is now happily married.

1. SLOW DOWN 

I like to think of it as driving in lower gear!

With our busy lives, numerous responsibilities, and high-profile positions with never-ending to-do lists, it can easily happen that we rush through our day at high speed, which is the quickest way to lose touch with our femininity.

Matilda stopped running through the airport terminals like “a headless chicken in a business suit, stomping her high heels in loud noise” (those are her exact words, by the way).

Instead, Matilda made a point of relaxing her shoulders, dropping into her body, breathing, and putting her feet down gracefully and with less noise, as I taught her to do. She absolutely loves the way this makes her feel. She now uses these moments to practise deep breathing and relaxation.

2. SMILE MORE 

I regularly remind myself to slow down, walk my feminine walk, and simply enjoy. As soon as I take the time to do so, I immediately find plenty of reasons to smile.

Matilda practised this on her usual way home from the airport, passing by the supermarket to shop and go home to cook dinner. Instead of rushing, she paid attention to the way she walked. The flowers in the supermarket made her smile, so she stopped and took time to choose a bouquet for her kitchen counter.

Daydreaming and appreciating the flowers, she was approached by a man she describes as an absolute gentleman and asked out on a date.

3. MAKE EYE CONTACT 

I can assure you that, in this state of taking the time to slow down and then expressing your appreciation with a smile, you will already draw men to you.

When you are residing in your feminine this way, allowing eye contact is all that is needed on your part, and men will approach you.

If you are new to this, just like I was, here is how it works: While you slow down and take time to appreciate life and smile, when your eyes cross those of a nice man, challenge yourself to hold eye contact for a little longer than usual. You can count to 3 seconds, smile, then break eye contact by looking away, and shortly after return to eye contact.

Depending on your cultural background, making eye contact this way can feel challenging. I understand you; I struggled with that too, back when I was dating as a single girl. What helped me was reminding myself that I can choose to make eye contact in a safe environment and that I am generally safe.

Summary

Slowing down, smiling more, and allowing eye contact to happen immediately puts you in your feminine energy, and men can approach you. Whereas doing everything in a rush, with no time to smile and no eye contact, is like a shield that makes it impossible for decent men to approach you.

If you are like Matilda, and ready to have it all, as the Modern Queen should—a successful career, a full, free life, and the love you desire and deserve—then your best next steps are here:

Inspired by Matilda’s example, download the Free Guide: The 13 Best Places to Meet Men

To get a strategy tailored to your high-profile life. Book a 30-minute Assessment Call 

Visit my Boutique and treat yourself to a self-study gift.  

Dedicated to Your Success in Love Since 2016

Anina Green | Soulmate Katalyst Ltd.

Clinical Psychologist, Certified Dating Coach, Wife, Physicist, Founder of Upshot-Dating®