Right after I got certified as a Dating & Relationship Coach, my trainer wrote this text about me:

Anina is the intuitively most talented coach I have ever trained …

Later on, it said:

… her own story of never feeling good enough, not beautiful or intelligent enough, even though she worked as a model and studied Physics… 

Then the first clients came in and when I asked them what made them choose me. (This is a common question to ask as new client because it helps you quickly understand where she is at.)

The reply was: “The not feeling good enough part.” 

Students, athletes, scientists, successful strong and smart women, and they all suffered form the same “disease” as I did back then.

Even though accomplished on the surface and according to what it said on paper.

Deep down inside, they did not feel good enough.

And me sharing this about myself, set them free to admit how they felt. 

Sitting there looking at the first cohort of wonderful total jackpot women that came to me as clients, I asked myself: 

“What else do they think they need to be good enough?”

There is nothing else; they are good enough. Amazing that they can’t see that. 

Amazing, I could not see that I was already good enough back then.  

A model, running marathons and excelling at Physics. 

And I am sure, so are you right now, already good enough! 

The issue is not that we are not good enough, it is that we feel as if we are not. 

Besides that not feeling good enough is needless suffering, and it limits your joy and appreciation for what you have already achieved. 

If you do not feel good enough, you are not able to receive a man into your life who loves you for who you are and to whom you are definitely good enough. 

What usually helps my clients ease into their worth and takes the pressure off of having to be good enough is the fact that men do not fall in love with women for their accomplishments. 

He will fall in love with you for the way he feels when he is around you. 

Here are the five steps to finally feel good enough.

Step 1:  Awareness. 

The awareness that you are, in fact, instructing your mind and feelings in this negative way gives you the access you need to change it. Understanding this is the first step. 

Step 2:  Separate yourself from your feelings and thoughts. 

When you are immersed in this negative mindset and subsequent feeling of not being good enough, there is no separation between you and your negative thoughts. Your negative thoughts dictate your reality. 

Shake off the negative thoughts like my dog shakes off stress. And let them be like water off a duck’s back. 

Step 3: Insert doubt.

Is this really true, objectively and not just influenced by my bad feelings?

Would I allow someone else to talk to me this way?

Would I speak this way to my daughter or best friend? 

Step 4: Find proof of the opposite.

For each nonsense sentence about yourself, your looks or your accomplishments. Find three statements that are positive and contradict the hurtful stuff you were thinking and feeling. 

Step 5: Make these steps your habit. 

In the same way, it has become a habit to repeat the negative chatter about yourself. 

Repeat all the good things and catch yourself when you think hurtful, negative thoughts.

It is like a gym exercise. There will be resistance at the start, but you will use these new neuropathways until they are solid and have become your new normal.

>>> This is mindset work; to you being the Queen of Your Mind and creating the love and life you want. 

Anina xoxo