June 3, 2025
Mindset
Why Upshot-Dating™ is Not Cheating. 

Upshot-Dating™, my Signature System, can and most of he time does mean dating several men simultaneously. 

Dating several men simultaneously can feel challenging and sound wrong. 

Read the main articles: What is Upshot-Dating™ and What Upshot-Dating™ is not. 

Here is why and when dating several men simultaneously is not cheating. 

Upshot-Dating™, as the name implies, is goal-oriented. 

Contrary to conventional dating, where women can get their hearts broken and lose years on the wrong man, my system is heartbreak-proof and time-efficient. 

Part of its efficiency and high client success rate is that my clients date multiple men at a time. They get to know them on public dates, meeting for coffee and dinners, attending events, and having conversations—all where you can get to know each other and check for compatibility.

Here is why this is not cheating. 

Cheating is an action to disobey an agreement.

For you to be able to cheat, there first needs to be an agreement.

In early dating, there is no such agreement. 

You are free to date others until you specifically discuss being exclusive and seeing each other exclusively. 

It is wrong to assume that because you went for a 1st or several subsequent dates, accepting invites from other men is cheating. 

Remember not to assume you are exclusive unless he has brought it up and asked you for it. 

For you as a woman, there is an additional benefit of dating several men.

  • You will not feel over-attached and emotionally invested in a man who has not yet proven worthy of it.  
  • You will not feel desperate; make him the centre of your life and start thinking that only he can give you the relationship you want. 
  • Instead, you stay centred and do not lose your power, as the women and the prize in dating and love. 

Let’s run through early dating with Woman A, who is upshot-dating™, and Woman B, who is unfamiliar with my Signature System. 

Woman A, the Modern Queen Version of Yourself, will date and enjoy the process; she is warm, open, fun and unattached. 

Read here: How Modern Queens fall in love

Woman B will falsely assume that after one date, she owes the man loyalty and accepting another date would be considered cheating on him. 

Grown-up secure men understand that it takes more time to make such a commitment.

He may feel that you could be the one (my husband knew right away), yet he will not claim you are exclusive with him after a few hours. Consider it a red flag if a man does.

In both scenarios, the man was simply dating the woman and enjoying her company. 

After a few dates, he stopped calling, and for woman A, this was okay.

She acknowledges that he is not the right one and makes space for the right man to come. Because woman A was not attached to or overinvested in him, she can observe this and stay on her throne, letting the best man win.

To woman B, this was a disaster;

She thought they were in a relationship, and she had already taken down her dating profile and declined invites from other men. She made him the centre of attention and began waiting around for him to call her, and when he stopped, she was crushed. 

If you are single, in your 30s, and want to start a family, Upshot-Dating™, being woman A, is the way to go. 

Here are four places to start right away:

1.) Put your name on the (*free) Bronze Level Email List. 

2.) Watch my Introduction Video on Upshot-Dating™

3.) Treat yourself to a Self-Study Program in my Boutique.

4.) And for those of you who are ready to be supported at the Gold Level, book your initial call with me here.

To your success in love,

Anina 

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