Knowing about these three types of men is crucial when dating and choosing the right man to build a happy, healthy, and lasting relationship. It is one of the most important and practical pieces of information I can give you.
Upshot-Dating® and its three core modules—mindset work, self-love, and dating skill—only apply to one type of man: The Type-3-Man.
What is Upshot-Dating®, the Modern Queen’s Way to Date
With a Type 1 or Type 2 man, my dating advice won’t work for different reasons. It does not work on feminine men (or only to some degree), and it doesn’t change a man who is unable to have a relationship. This goes to show that none of what I provide is games or manipulation; it is, rather, a bridge you build and a door you open to connect with the right man.
My system helps you be your true self—the Modern Queen version of you. When you show up as her in dating, the right man for you will find you; I see it happen all the time.
In reverse, if you are unaware of these three types of men, you may falsely believe you just have to be more feminine, that the man will then be masculine, and that the relationship will be fixed. Or, you will falsely assume that if you just work on yourself more, the man you are with will change and become who you want him to be.
Type 1: The Feminine Man
Also known as the Prince (that is how he will feel) or the Cute Boy. Sometimes he is referred to as the wounded masculine-energy man.
Characteristics: He is sensitive, thoughtful, deep, caring, very loving, and sweet. You can have hour-long conversations with him, almost like with a girlfriend.
The Attraction: This may feel like you finally found a man you can connect to. He gets you, he gets what you feel and think, because he is similar.
The Issue: He is too similar to you—not masculine enough. He is unable to follow up or take the lead, and he needs you to do that for him.
In early dating, women often excuse his passivity by telling themselves he needs a nudge, that he is just shy, or that he doesn’t want to be pushy. Further down the line, in a relationship, when you have children, this man will exhaust you in the long term by pushing you into your masculine role.
The Type 1 man may also feel new and different at first if you have never dated a feminine man. He can seem very different, attuned to you, and special.
Unfortunately, he will not suddenly become more masculine later once you need him to be, or when you discover that being more feminine feels better to your nervous system. As my client Aline said:
“My ex was so in touch with his emotions that he would cry all the time. I felt exhausted after spending a weekend with him. When I met my now-husband, I immediately felt I could be married to this man because he was so stable and calm (Aline got married to a Type 3 man through Upshot-Dating®). He does not exhaust me; I get to be the feminine partner in this relationship.”
With a Type 1 man, you will always have to meet him halfway and accept that he can “out-feminine” you at any time. Many women spend thousands on counselling, relationship coaching, and trying to change this man. My advice is to make a conscious choice if this is okay for you and, if not, move on.
In my observation and ten years of experience, women are a match for—and attract—the Type 1 man as long as they do not fully own their role as the feminine partner in a romantic relationship.
I also call this “Warrior-Woman-Mode™”.
When a client transforms out of overly masculine mode, the Type 1 man loses his appeal. She is now able to bring emotional depth to the relationship, which is a woman’s gift to begin with. Once she is ready to lead with her heart, she draws in the masculine Type 3 man who craves this from his woman.
If you are single right now, starting on the right foot with Upshot-Dating® and dating the feminine way, the Type 1 man will naturally fall off your radar.
Type 2: The Superstar
This is the exciting man; he is a great seducer—another version of wounded masculine energy.
Characteristics: He is attractive, handsome, charming, successful, and very masculine. On dates, he makes you feel like you are the only woman in the world.
The Reality: He is good at dating and less so at marriage. He will be all into you too early and much too soon. He is unbalanced and, at some point, will withdraw.
The Pattern: He goes hot and cold. He is not emotionally available, even though his intensity makes you feel that way. This relationship is about chemistry instead of substance. The fire will burn out quickly.
Regardless of how excellent my coaching skills and signature system are, they can never compensate for a man who is simply not ready or mature enough. The Type 2 man is not able to have a real relationship. You will “unmatch” this type of man when you heal your unhealthy attraction patterns, shed light on your intimacy fears, and stop falling for chemistry.
While a relationship with the Type 1 man can work—if you accept that he will not become more masculine and you will have to compensate for that—I will always tell you to stay away from the so-called “superstar”, the Type 2 man.
You will “unmatch” the Type 2 man when you heal your unhealthy attraction patterns, shed light on your intimacy fears, and stop falling for chemistry.
Type 3: The Stable, Empowered Man
He is the stable, normal, and empowered masculine energy man. This is the man I recommend to every woman because of how he makes you feel as a woman.
His Pace: He moves at a slow but steady pace. He will call when he says he will, but won’t text you all day. He won’t fall head over heels immediately; he builds a relationship.
His Nature: He is stable, strong, and predictable. He wants to solve problems and stay away from drama. He also won’t pull away suddenly, because he has moved at a steady speed.
The “Boring” Factor: He is also the “boring” man, if you still have inner work to do.
When I was Upshot-Dating®, I knew myself well enough to know that I did not want to be with a Type 1 man, and I had healed my unhealthy patterns, so I get immediately turned off by a Type 2 man.
Usually, successful relationships, in which women feel happy and relaxed and have romantic tension and attraction, are with men who fit this category. My husband is this type of man. When I met him in Singapore, he was kind and calm. He knew what he wanted and moved our relationship forward to get married in nine months. I immediately felt calm and safe with him.
Quoting another client, Pearl: “It is good when a man knows how to be a man.”
Read here how she describes meeting her soulmate in her own words.
The Type 3 Man is the man to whom all my dating advice applies. He is the type of man I recommend to every woman. My work will help you attract him.
Start here and download my Free guide: How to Find the Right Man Fast
Dedicated to Your Success in Love Since 2016
Anina Green | Soulmate Katalyst Ltd.
Clinical Psychologist, Certified Dating Coach, Wife, Physicist, Founder of Upshot-Dating®